It is now the 3rd day since the rather abrupt cancellation of my surgery and it's Canada Day. This is probably the first time our family hasnt planned some kind of "event" for Canada Day. I remember when my mother had a highrise condo on Saskatchewan Drive; we had a couple of Canada Day parties there culminating with a perfect box seat on the 10th floor balcony for the fireworks display ;-D
We were not expecting to all be together this Canada Day, for obvious reasons, I know I was a little at a loss as to what I really wanted to do so I decided to spend at least a good portion of the day at the hospital where my mother was finally placed on a ward. Afterward, I visited one of my good friends, who, I might add didnt even get a phone call when all the crap went down and had only heard through the grapevine at my old place of employment that my surgery was cancelled. When she had called and left a message, she wasnt sure if I was waiting at the hospital or home {shakes head} I am still in awe at the far reaching effects that this experience is having on humanity.
I had decided holding my breath would not be a good thing lol so I have been trying to be productive and work on things that I did not get a chance to do before the 28th. I am not going to even hazard a guess as to when they will call but I am going to keep on top of my vascular surgeons office and maybe ask my family docs office for my $60 back unless of course GWL reimburses me, though I would feel better asking for my money back lol.
I am starting to really calm back down now, wow only took 3 days and I notice that the muscles across the tops of my shoulders are sore from being so tense. My foot has seemed to calm down as well for I have not suffered any particular ill effects from my walk home from Canada Place yesterday. The girls were at first ready to spring once again as I walked to the bank and the bakery as well during the same, say 9-12 block round trip. I took my time and had my walker; I left Canada Place by 2;15pm or so and was home just before it started to rain at 4:30pm so I took my time and it was good. Like getting back up on the horse again in a manner of speaking. Sort of a crash course in self confidence boosting. Though it has been difficult over the last 72 hours, I can feel my focus/confidence/determination returning and even more so as I am accomplishing some of the errant tasks that need to be completed preferably before the surgery is rescheduled.
I think by the end of this weekend I may also be caught up on my sleep; this is ALWAYS a good thing lol and doesnt happen often this quickly so I feel good about how things are progressing. ;-D
I still have a slight sense of the nagging "hurry up and get it over with" syndrome but just remind myself that this is something that is clearly out of my hands and therefore already perfect even if I cannot envision how that would look. Who am I to say/try? Que sera, sera - Peace
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