Day 10

So, as I sit on my porch in the rain, I realize that time is just flowing by. . .but rather than be upset or apprehensive, I have a pervading sense of calm. I have to admit that when I started the 30 day countdown, I was anything but calm lol. Not so much nervousness, more like apprehension or fear of the unknown. I have been doing a fair bit of research on my own, seeing as how my vascular surgeon doesn't feel the need to "see" me before the surgery {?!?} I have a myriad of questions, not about the various ways this procedure can be done but as to which method he is choosing to use. Just how many times has he done this anyway?!?
Not that I don't trust him, I mean he lost a balloon in the end of one of my arteries somewhere down there, but he told me about it ;-D so it's all good lol we are only human and everyone makes mistakes sometimes. Who knows? Maybe he will find it THIS time lol
Anyway, back to the time thing; I am finding that I don't even have time to lament that time is passing to quickly. This is actually a good thing ;-) It helps perpetuate the sense of ease and that somehow this situation is flowing along as it should.
I feel the need to interject something here that I am experiencing, it is now 6:05 am Sunday morning, I was asleep after an interesting evening out with my sweetie, celebrating a co-worker's birthday but I had talked my boyfriend out of my dog's usual walk before bed so she woke me up at 3:17 ;-/ I have been wide awake ever since so decided to catch up on some episode of a series I like and when that didn't help me to become sleepy, I decided to read more of the book that my sister gave me. The more I read, the more I realize what a precious gift she has given me ;-D It is like a re-awakening, in a manner of speaking; like I have been holding my breath, all this time, and can finally let it out. Thank you.
When I first started this book, my thoughts were: oh, this is alot to take in but the more I read the more I have a sense of remembering rather than being overwhelmed. This truly makes me smile and helps me know that I have nothing to fear with this operation.
On that note: I am going to go snuggle up to my sweetie for an hour or so before the "house" wakes up for Day 9 ;-D Here's to another good day! Peace